Q. Why do men take showers instead of baths?
A. Pissing in the bath is disgusting.

Q. How can you tell a macho woman?
A. She rolls her own tampons.

Q. Why do fags like ribbed condoms?
A. Better traction in the mud.

Q. What’s the difference between a woman and a sheep?
A. The sheep doesn’t get upset if you screw her sister. (more…)

A man returns from the doctor and tells his wife that the doctor has
told him he has only 24 hours to live. Given this prognosis, the
man asks his wife for sex. Naturally, she agrees, and they make
love.

About six hours later, the husband goes to his wife and says,
“Honey, you know I now have only 18 hours to live. Could we please
do it one more time?” (more…)

A young woman who had been married for several years was growing more and more frustrated at her husband’s lack of interest in sex. She wondered about ways to add some pizzazz to their sexual relationship, and finally decided to purchase some crotchless underwear she had seen in a novelty shop. One evening when she was feeling particularly desirous and he was, as usual, watching television, she took a shower, freshened up, and donned her crotchless undies and a slinky negligee. She then strolled between her partner and the television and naughtily tossed ne leg up on his chair arm.

“Want some of this?” she purred.

“ARE YOU KIDDING???” he replied,

“LOOK WHAT IT DID TO YOUR PANTIES!!!”

Guy is sitting quietly reading his paper when his wife sneaks up behind him and whacks him on the head with a frying pan.

“What was that for?” he says.

“That was for the piece of paper in your pants pocket with the name Marylou written on it,” she replies.

“Two weeks ago when I went to the races, Marylou was the name of one of the horses I bet on,” he explains.

She looks satisfied, apologizes, and goes off to do work around the house. (more…)

Little Johnny has just been toilet trained and decides to use the big
toilet like his daddy. He pushes up the seat and balances his little
penis on the rim.

Just then the toilet seat slams down, and little Johnny lets out a
scream.

His mother comes running to find Johnny hopping round the room clutching

his genitals and howling. (more…)