Two men are in the doctor’s office waiting to get vasectomies. A nurse comes in and asks the men to strip and put on their medical gowns while they wait for the doctor.

A few minutes later she comes back, reaches under one man’s gown and begins to give him a hand job.

Shocked, he says, “My God, what are you doing?”

To which she replies, “We have to vacate the sperm from your system to have a clean procedure.” (more…)

A guy was in a strange town and feeling lonely. He found a brothel and knocked on the door. The madam answered and welcomed him in. However, when she asked him how much money he wanted to spend, he had to admit that he only had twenty dollars.

To the man’s surprise, the madam didn’t seem the least bit concerned. She took his twenty dollars and told him to go up to Room 2B, where he would find some company. The man went up to Room 2B, open the door and walked in. The room was dimly lit, but after his eyes adjusted he could see that there was a turkey in the corner. “A turkey?” he thought. “Do you mean that I spent twenty dollars for sex with a turkey?” (more…)

How many members of the Bush administration does it take to change a light bulb?

1. One to deny that a light bulb needs to be changed;

2. One to attack the patriotism of anyone who says the light bulb needs to be changed;

3. One to blame Clinton for burning out the light bulb;

4. One to arrange the invasion of a country rumored to have a secret stockpile of light bulbs; (more…)

Regardless of whether this is an Internet fable, it’s a good story:

One of the best comeback lines of all time. It’s a portion of a National Public Radio (NPR) interview between a female broadcaster and US Marine Corps General Reinwald who was about to sponsor a Boy Scout Troop visiting his military installation.

FEMALE INTERVIEWER: So, General Reinwald, what things are you going to teach these young boys when they visit your base?

GENERAL REINWALD: We’re going to teach them climbing, canoeing, archery, and shooting. (more…)

Friendship Between Women:
A woman didn’t come home one night. The next day she told her Husband that she had slept over at a girlfriend’s house. The man called his wife’s 10 best friends. None of them knew anything about it.

Friendship Between Men:
A man didn’t come home one night. The next day he told his wife that he had slept over at a buddy’s house. The woman called her husband’s 10 best friends. Eight of them confirmed that he had slept over, and two claimed that he was still there.